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by Robert SamuelsTwo Plus Two Magazine, Vol. 16, No. 9When someone tells a bad beat story, what are they really trying to accomplish? On one level, it is clear that they want sympathy for their misfortune, but how does sympathy make the pain go away? Is there some magical process that alleviates suffering? If someone shows that they care, does that really make me feel better? To respond to these questions, we have to return to the root cause of our social relationships.
Freud argued that when a baby cries to be fed, the baby is not just making a demand for milk. Rather, the child is seeking recognition, love, and understanding. In other words, the suffering baby wants the parent to understand what the child needs and recognize that the child is suffering so that love and care will be supplied. From a psychoanalytic viewpoint, people are constantly making this type of demand, and so even if someone asks you for a simple thing, they may be asking for a whole lot more.
One time, my young daughter was in the bath and demanded buttered toast. I told her that the bread will be destroyed by the bathwater, but she just got more insistent, and she started to cry out, “just one crumb! Can’t you give me just one crumb!” It should be clear that she did not just want something to eat. Instead, she wanted me to give into her demand. Here we see that a request for a particular object might really be a demand for someone to give up and submit to the will of the demander. What the child ultimately wants is for the powerful parents to give up their power and freedom. The insistent, demanding child does not just want love or recognition: the child wants an unconditional surrender.
Returning to the issue of why people tell bad beat stories, we find a similar demand for attention and recognition. The person telling the story not only wants the audience to show signs of shared pain, but the story teller is also asking the audience to take on responsibility for the problem, while the story teller remains good and innocent. As a form of victimhood identity, the person telling the bad beat story wants the other to affirm that the loss was not the fault of the person who was beat. In order to escape from any bad feelings of guilt and shame, the goal of telling the story is then to absolve the player from any responsibility. The role of the audience therefore is to affirm that the loser was just the victim of external evil forces, and that in a world of true justice, this type of thing would not happen.
Of course, there is no natural just order in the world, but people like to imagine that there is some underlying force that balances all accounts and imposes a perfect system of moral order. Even the most scientific and rational people fall back into magical thinking because they do not want to accept the possibility that there is no inherent order to the universe. As hard as we try to escape superstition, we have a difficult time acknowledging reality because it can be so painful. We also do not want to accept our own responsibility for our failures and losses, and so we must believe that some higher power is in control of everything.
When a player exclaims, “That was so sick!,” what they are often really saying is that bad things should not happen to good people, and it is unfair that the world is unjust. Poker players have a hard time accepting that even an unlikely event can continue to happen, and so they think that the world has become sick when they do not get want they want. As a form of entitlement tilt, many players just think it is unfair when they do not get their way every time. Just look at Phil Helmuth’s many blow-ups. They almost all center on him feeling that he has been treated unjustly because some “idiot” has dared to beat him in a hand. Similar to Daniel Negreanu’s recent meltdown, it is hard for people not to feel that they are entitled to win in a just universe. The problem is that no one is entitled to anything, and the world is not inherently just.
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As I have argued in previous articles, one reason why it so important to think about bad beat stories is that it helps us to understand what we want from others inside and outside of poker. Ultimately, we want someone else or something else to be responsible for our suffering because we do not want to take responsibility for our own actions. As a way of escaping feelings of guilt and shame, we transfer responsibility onto others, but this makes us deny the reality of our own lives. In terms of poker, there is no way to get better if you do not recognize what you are doing wrong, but if you hide all of your faults and blame others, then you will never advance. Here we see why having a good mental game is so important. We can only improve if we understand ourselves, and this understanding is often blocked by our desire to protect our positive self-image.
Someone like Phil Helmuth is the rare exception of a player who appears to have little self-insight, but still manages to be successful. Even though he often goes on tilt and blames others for his own mistakes, Phil has been able to make it work for him. However, the exception often proves the rule, and the rule that Phil proves is that for most people, you will not able to improve if you do not take responsibility for your own actions. Helmuth thus provides a very bad example for the rest of the poker community since he has been able to get away with seeing life from the perspective of bad beats.
Poker Strategy and Other Topics - September 2020
by Andrew Brokos
by Carlos Welch
by Péter Gelencsér
by Anonymous
by Robert Samuels
by David Sklansky
by Nick Willett
by Ray Zee
With another two 75-minute levels in the books, it's time for an update. Warning: if you're an ElkY fan, you're not going to like it.
It's fair to say the Team Pro had a pretty lousy day. Nothing went ElkY's way - from doubling up Mindaugas Jonuskis with top two against a set, to eventually busting to Roman Kleyman. ElkY jammed on the button with J♥9♦ after it folded to him; he had just 349,000 or eight big blinds. Kleyman found the K♦J♠ in the small blind and made the call.
The T♦Q♦6♣ flop gave both open-ended straight draws, but the 3♥ turn and 7♣ river kept Kleyman's king-high in front. ElkY exited in 23rd Place for €6,803.
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Having come in to the day second in chips, this is not the way any of us saw this one going. However, once the cards were in the air, it felt like nothing went ElkY's way. So sick - on to the next one, Bertrand.
Another player for whom things didn't go well was Germany's Gerhard Brimmers (20th - €6,803). Now, if I told you he was all-in with the 7♦2♦, you'd probably tell me he deserved to be out. But you don't understand - he'd flopped two pair on a J♣7♣2♣ board.
Pre-flop, Sonay Kehya had opened to 90,000 and Brimmers decided to defend his big blind. When that flop fell Brimmers open-shoved for 1 million, which was four times the size of the pot! A huge overbet, and one that Kehya had no trouble calling with his Q♥Q♣. He was behind though, and the 9♠ turn was safe for Brimmers. But the Q♠ river gave Kehya a set and delivered the cruel knockout blow.
We've also lost this lot over the past two levels:
Place | Name | Country | Status | Prize (€) |
---|---|---|---|---|
17 | Max Henkel | Germany | 6,803 | |
18 | Pavel Stolař | Czech Republic | 6,803 | |
19 | Karel Mokry | Czech Republic | 6,803 | |
20 | Gerhard Brimmers | Germany | 6,803 | |
21 | Felix Schulze | Germany | 6,803 | |
22 | Ivan Sebeledi | Slovakia | 6,803 | |
23 | Bertrand Grospellier | France | PokerStars Team Pro | 6,803 |
24 | David Novak | Czech Republic | 5,367 | |
25 | Patrick Max Brück | Germany | 5,367 |
Start-of-day chip leader Peter Kamaras had a big blow to his stack, courtesy of Michael Rohde. The German opened to 105,000 under the gun with the K♣9♣ and Kamaras flat called with K♦K♠ in the hijack. It folded to the blinds, and Robert Schunemann called in the small with the A♥8♦, while Mindaugas Jonuskis defended his big with the 2♥2♠.
The flop came 9♠7♣7♠ pairing Rohde, who continued for 110,000 when it checked to him. Kamaras then raised it to 240,000, only for Rohde to three-bet to 605,000 when the blinds both folded. Kamaras just flatted and the turn came the 9♦ giving Rohde a full house. He didn't slow down; this time he made it 415,000 and Kamaras just called again. Finally the 7♥ completed the board and put a full house out there. Rohde was still best though and went for 520,000 worth of value, which he got when Kamaras called and saw the bad news. He dropped to 1.4 million, while Rohde increased by 1.9 million.
Here's a look at the chips for the final 16:
Name | Country | Chips |
---|---|---|
Michael Rohde | Germany | 3650000 |
Leonardo Romeo | Italy | 3150000 |
Stanislav Koleno | Slovakia | 3140000 |
Petr Svoboda | Czech Republic | 3030000 |
Patrick Börnicke | Germany | 3000000 |
Roman Kleyman | Russian Federation | 2450000 |
Sonay Kehya | Netherlands' | 2230000 |
Arünas Jocius | Lithuania | 2075000 |
Marián Flešár | Slovakia | 2030000 |
Oguz Cenk | Belgium | 1650000 |
Péter Kamarás | Hungary | 1445000 |
Artürs Ščerbaks | Latvia | 1400000 |
JAn Stariat | Czech Republic | 1115000 |
Robert Schünemann | Germany | 1035000 |
Michal Jan Lubas | Poland | 430000 |
Mindaugas Jonuškis | Lithuania | 355000 |
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